I had a baby and lost my friends

There's a side of motherhood that doesn't get talked about much. Not the sleepless nights or the nappy blowouts. The loneliness. The quiet grief of realising you're not the same person you were before and not knowing what to do with that. Especially when the people you love most, your friends, haven't changed at all.

This week on the podcast, a listener wrote in and said something that stopped me in my tracks. She called herself a horrible person. She's 35, nine months into being a mum, and she's been ghosting her five best friends, the women who've been her ride or dies since her twenties. Not because they've done anything wrong. Because she doesn't recognise herself anymore and she doesn't know how to explain that without making it sound like their lives don't matter.

I'll be honest, this one hit close to home for me. I've been in this exact position. And what Ben and I talk about in this episode what I learnt the hard way.

If you've ever felt that gap between who you are now and who your friends still expect you to be, I think you'll feel seen by this one.

[LISTEN NOW]

This isn't just a new mum thing, by the way. This is a "life changed and nobody told me it would cost me people" thing. Whether it's having a baby, a career shift, a breakup, or just growing in different directions, there comes a point where you look around and realise your world doesn't quite match the people in it anymore. And how you handle that moment matters.

Give it a listen. And if it lands, send it to a friend who needs to hear it.

And one more thing. It's Mother's Day this Sunday. To every mum reading this, whether you're in the thick of it with a newborn, navigating the teenage years, or holding it all together in a way nobody sees, happy Mother's Day. You're doing more than you think.

With love,

Nichole & Ben

P.S. Know a new mum who's gone quiet on the group chat? Maybe she's not busy. Maybe she just doesn't have the words yet. Send her this episode. It might be the thing that helps her say what she's actually feeling.